Recently I worked in quite a few projects aiming at empowering people, such as students but also underrepresented groups in the industry, to code. One of the larger ones is probably Jugend Hackt, a Hackathon for teens between 13 and 19, where I mentored a group in its Berlin edition earlier this year. In the past I had mentored groups of high school students as well, trying to hand over the projects I did at my former school nearly nine years ago to a newer Generation of students, but they ended up employing a network administrator instead of sticking with the concept of a entirely student run schools network, like it was nine years ago.
After having spent most of 2018 working in my first post-uni Job at Port Zero as a Software and System Engineer, I eventually had my exit talk a few days ago aiming for a new position somewhere else in 2019. A month ago I blogged about how I felt burned out and tired being involved in two major project having had a hard time keeping up with them, despite working overtime, and what I’ve learned in those stressful days, so last month I tried to fix and evaluate if I’m able to at least fix certain problems I was having or if I should be honest to myself, that I may not be the type of person who enjoys consulting work that much.
Since I felt overwhelmed and anxious by my workload during the last weeks I decided to do a short trip to Paris on my own. I literally booked the flight, left my work on time on my last day before vacation, boarded a plane and arrived at Paris two hours later. It was one of the most calming and self-careish things to do, to travel on my own and not having to care about my Spoons, because usually, I feel way more exhausted after going on vacation leave then I do before, which is, mostly, because I’m introvert and wallflowerish af and not really a peoples girl.
Recovery isn’t linear in the most cases and recently I felt pretty burned out and tired and while I’m still sleepy and sometimes a bit low performing in terms of productive things, I’ll try to recap in this post how that has happend and what possible ways out of this may be. how did this happen? This year was full of amazing things, recapping this in a few bullets: * I got my first full-time job * I left uni for a job * I moved into a new flat share * I started to live in a city with even more friends I care about * I finally overcame my depressed episode entirely * cutted out toxic people of my life * and started to build healthy and caring relationships (<3!
Long story short I sent in my MacBook to Apple Care again recently, experiencing some major display issues, so that leaves me with having to use my spare laptop, a somewhat 2013-ish ThinkPad x230 and while I generally like that machine, I’ll probably have to upgrade the screen to somewhat FHD/2k (probably 13.3 inch having to cut the bezel as well) and upgrade the keyboard with a x220 one in the near future since a 1366x768px display isn’t usable anymore in 2018.
Since I needed to come up with a decent on-site backup solution beside having my two off-site backup servers up and running, and having to work with external HDDs is not an option, I eventually started to look out for an NAS device to store my backups on. First I considered that I wanted to build such a device from scratch, possibly putting inside some undervolted AMD CPU, eventually soldered on a ITX form factor mainboard having plenty of S-ATA slots, at least two NIC and round about 8GB of RAM.
As soon as @bourryto and I moved into our flat share, we wanted to improve our key sharing and door opening concept, especially since I tend to forget my keys quite a lot. We live on the third floor of a four floor appartment building, so we were able to change the key cylinder of our appartment itself but obviously not the one being used for opening the front door.
Some years ago I’ve shared a zine about panic attacks with a few friends of mine. I got diagnosed with a panic and anxiety disorder in 2015 and since then I made tons of experiences with having to deal with panic and anxiety, whilst being part of the kink community. Let’s talk about experiencing panic attacks while playing as a top! Assumptions & Problematic Things Inside the Community A major problem of discussing panic attacks and BDSM is, that there are plenty of toxic assumptions within large parts of the scene leading to a mostly binary point of view on some issues.
I had to hand in my main laptop to service recently since I have experienced some GPU errors and keys refusing to work as they should. Having given away my 2012 11’ MacBook Air I haven’t had a decent spare device to write fiction ad blogposts on, not to think of light code work in the first place. So I went shopping and since I did not felt comfortable buying a cheapish or used laptop (probably ThinkPad), I went with an 2018ish iPad teamed up with an Apple Pencil, since that would be a device fitting way better into my set-up than a laptop I would stop using when my main laptop would be back in my backpack.
I started building hackintoshes back in high school because at that time I simply couldn’t afford buying anything else than a hackintosh build based on used components. In 2011 my main reason to switch from a Linux to a Mac machine was, that I had to run graphics design programs on my computers and seven years later barely a thing has changed in terms that there’s still no Adobe CC for Linux systems, I still enthusiastically prefer not to use Windows for anything else than casual gaming, except that while I am happy using my second MacBook (after having had a 2012 Air for literally years, I switched to a MacBook Pro 2017 last December), Apple somehow fails at providing a decent line-up in terms of desktop macintosh.